I WANT MY OWN COBRASNAKE T-SHIRT

Image source: facehunter

REFRESHED AND RELAXED

Michael Sanders Photography

So I just came back from the gym (and shower) and I feel so fantastic! I loved the rush I got when walking back to my apartment, so zen, so chill. After such a busy day, there's something I adore about the aftermath of exercise. 

Image source: ru_glamour

Support the Stimulus or the Terrorists Win

This is a pretty funny political cartoon, because it compares Republicans who are a no-go on the stimulus to "corrupt and deceitful" regimes, which Obama made the fist comments about during his inaugural address. This means that if you don't support a trillion dollars for a pork-laden monstrosity, you're a fucking terrorist! haha.

This parlays with the Democrats trying to blame The One's failed bipartisan support on a media personality, which might be a winning political strategy if you're reading the Hugo Chavez playbook. They've also unleashed a series of imbeciles to counter the so called "right wing noise" machine. The spokeswoman on Cavuto who forgot to take her meds and tried defending the stimulus package was incredibly humorous, particularly when she talked about buckets of money.

When you have the political opposition calling you traitors, you know you're doing something right and they are getting desperate. So, before we commit national suicide by passing this multi-headed hydra of wasteful spending, drop the cheesy rhetoric and consider what's in it. From Director Blue:

• $83 billion in welfare payments (the earned income credit for people who don't pay income tax)
• $81 billion for Medicaid
• $66 billion on "education", more than the entire Department of Education required just ten years ago
• $36 billion for expanded unemployment benefits
• $20 billion for food stamps
• $8 billion on "renewable energy" projects, which have a low or negative return
• $7 billion for "modernizing federal buildings and facilities"
• $6 billion on urban transit systems, dominated by unions and which, almost universally, lose money
• $2.4 billion for "carbon-capture demonstration projects"
• $2 billion for child-care subsidies
• $1 billion for Amtrak, the federal railroad that's run in the red for 40 years
• $650 million for "digital TV conversion coupons" (on top of billions already spent)
• $600 million on new cars for government (added to the $3 billion already spent each year)
• $400 million for "global-warming research"
• $50 million for the National Endowment for the Arts

And the President wants to cut out 10% of the DoD's budget, but spend more on keeping reliable voters on the dole? The Democrats strategy of patriot economics doesn't add up. Nice try though.

No Major Violence During Provincial Elections in Iraq

Compared to the violence that ravaged Iraq during the 2005 elections, this is nothing short of phenomenal, but not entirely surprising, since people over there predicted that things would go well. There was no major violence, even in troubled provinces like Ninawa and Diyala. From The Guardian:

Millions of Iraqis passed through security checkpoints and razor wire cordons today to vote in provincial elections considered to be a crucial test of the nation's stability.

Polls opened shortly after dawn after a step-by-step security clampdown across the country, including traffic bans in central Baghdad and other major cities and a closure of border crossings and airports.

By the time polls closed at 3pm GMT there were no reports of serious violence.

We should be reminded of what General Odierno said two weeks ago. From McClatchy:

Gen. Ray Odierno , the commanding U.S. general in Iraq , said that if the country held peaceful elections this year, the relative calm that had settled on Iraq would be "irreversible."

There's still national elections for Iraq later in the year, but the fact that U.S. forces are leaving a smaller footprint in Iraq is an encouraging sign that the Iraqi Security Forces are capable of taking care of business.

President Obama issued an offical statement congratulating the Iraqi people. The coalition forces will eventually leave Iraq and it will be a relatively stable democracy in a nation notorious for corrupt thug-ocracies. I'm not doing the Carlton dance to celebrate victory or anything, but it's certainly no Vietnam II like many predicted.

First They Came For the Bus-Shitters

Subrookie emails a tip that the WA legislature is going to pass a bill making defecation on a public bus a crime. From The Strangler:

HB 1606: The Nanny State Doesn't Want You to Shit on the Bus

Believe it or not, taking a dump on the bus is not explicitly prohibited by state law. But if Representative Geoff Simpson (D-47) has his way, the halcyon days when you could poop on public transit to your heart's content may be coming to an end. What's worse: Simpson's bill also makes the not-yet-open light-rail line a poo-free zone.

If homeless people can't drop a deuce on the bus or in the library, where the hell are they supposed to go?!?

President Gets Cozy With Union Thugs

The President gave a nod to Big Labor, which always tends to have Democrats in its pockets, by reversing some Bush-era rules for federal workplaces. What sweeping regulations did the "party of the working man" provide? AP has the details:

Labor, riding high after quick wins with President Barack Obama, faces the harsh reality that the Democratic-controlled Congress will not find it easy to push more fiercely contested legislation to improve the status of workers or the unions trying to organize them.

Obama on Friday issued executive orders that union officials say will undo Bush administration policies favoring employers. Among the orders, federal contractors would be required to offer jobs to current workers when contracts change, and they would be prevented from receiving reimbursement for expenses meant to influence worker decisions on joining unions or engaging in collective bargaining.

I don't really have anything against the concept of unions, lest we have some Upton Sinclair-like dystopia for American workers. But the unions became too powerful and too greedy following WWII. Notoriously slow to adapt to new technology in the manufacturing sector (e.g. the UAW was extremely hostile to automation in automotive assembly plants in the 70s), getting mixed up with organized crime (like when the Teamsters let the mob use its pension fund as a bank), and demanding such costly benefits that it caused the many once-great American industries to get eaten alive by foreign competition.

Today, labor might not be as powerful, but they certainly can wield some influence. Opposition to Free Trade with Colombia was under the guise of human rights abuses by Uribe's government (which has vastly improved since the 90s), but was really about protectionism. Boeing workers went on strike last year, costing the company billions. Unsurprisingly, Boeing will have to lay off thousands this year due to that loss of productivity. So color me unimpressed with Big Labor. But what's most troubling is that they are just another special interest group looking for federal laws to be manipulated to what's best for them instead of what's best for America. It's ripping our country apart.

Michael Steele Wins RNC Chairman

Watching his victory speech on Fox News right now. He's talking about making the GOP more desirable to all Americans (e.g. winning in Northeastern states). Steele is fiscally conservative but socially moderate, so hopefully he'll provide some much needed leadership once the Democrats fuck everything up and they're voted out of office. Not that I want America to fail under Obama's leadership, but it seems inevitable at this point.

All Hail Steele, and His Glorious Regime!

Nationalized Health Care Part of Stimulus Package

Health Services to Become Super Efficient Overnight!

The influential economist Paul Krugman writes today that we need nationalized health care...now! So it's a pretty sure thing that the Democratic Party has issued their marching orders and is going to dump the big turd that is socialized health care on the taxpayers. Ideological opposition to health care isn't a difficult case to make. It's way outside the Constitutional responsibilities of the federal government, breeds a culture of sloth and reliance on federal aid, and socialized health care allows the government to interfere more with citizens private affairs. Practically speaking, it's too damn expensive and the government isn't even capable of providing effective health services to disabled vets via the VA. But that didn't stop some opportunistic Dems from slipping in free health care as part of the stimulus plan. From Hot Air:

Rahm Emanuel once advised that crisis means opportunity, and the Democrats have taken that message to heart. They’ve exploited the sense of economic crisis in order to build a Trojan Horse stimulus bill that encompasses all of their legislative goals — and they’re trying to stampede people into supporting it out of panic. Hope and Change? More like Fear and Loathing.

What this does has nothing to do with stimulating the economy. Worse, it exponentially increases the difficulty in reforming entitlements, and Medicare already was the one program most in need of reform. It’s heading into insolvency even without the additional load of ten million new and unplanned subscribers in three weeks. Now, we will have even more subscribers to throw into the reform grinder, making it more painful than ever to effect the necessary changes to bring the program back into solvency.

Powerline has the details of how Medicaid is going to be made available to damn near everyone if the stimulus package becomes law. Also, CATO took out a full page ad in the NYT to warn America that the stimulus was going to be a bust. Some might say the Cloward-Piven strategy of orchestrating mass chaos in society to usher in a new regime is a bit conspiratorial. But it certainly seems to be going that way.

Awwkkwwaarrd! Lady Who Called Hillary a "Monster" To Work for Hillary

Most people say all kinds of bad things about their employer and/or boss. But it's generally in hushed tones at work and not to an international media source, like Samatha Powers did last March when she called Hillary a "monster" while she was an Obama aide. From CBS:

The Associated Press reports that Power will serve as senior director for multilateral affairs at the National Security Council. This may make for some awkwardness: In her new capacity, Power will be in close contact and may have to travel with Clinton, the new Secretary of State.

Since the media firestorm that greeted her comments, Power has been inching back into a more public role in the Obama fold. She reached out to Clinton and was on transition teams for the State Department and the U.S. mission to the United Nations.

Officials close to the transition told the Associated Press that Power's gestures of apology have been well-received by Clinton. The two have met privately since the election. Both Clinton and Power appeared at the recent announcement of Obama's special envoys to South Asia and the Middle East, where they exchanged brief remarks.

Haha, to please Hillary Powers probably had to kiss her ring like some 14th-century penitent in the Vatican. Photos of Samantha Powers in the stockade outside Foggy Bottom will be posted once they become available.

It's my birthday

^^A penguin reflects on this day of remembrance.^^

No post today, I feel that the full impact of my birth is enough to keep the animals in line until Monday.

In the meantime, you can make this penguin cry by buying a shirt. For your dog. Or a mug. Or a thong. Or a 1973 Chevy Camaro (Penguins hate American made, it's why their documentary was French).

Hackers Provide Public Service, Alert Motorists To Looming Zombie Apocalypse

This is something bloggers like The Sniper and myself have been trying to do ever since Obama got elected! God bless these technically-savvy social deviants for providing such an important PSA. From Fox News:

Transportation officials in Texas are scrambling to prevent hackers from changing messages on digital road signs after one sign in Austin was altered to read, "Zombies Ahead."

Chris Lippincott, director of media relations for the Texas Department of Transportation, confirmed that a portable traffic sign at Lamar Boulevard and West 15th Street, near the University of Texas at Austin, was hacked into during the early hours of Jan. 19.

ABWF tips us off with video footage from Austin, but there were no zombies filmed feasting on brains. They must be still slogging their way back from the coronation in D.C. last week.

Just Like Witches at Black Masses

Brandon Friedman (A-stan vet) has some sharp analysis on why we need more troops in Afghanistan that's worth a read. Other COIN luminaries have called for more troops in Afghanistan, and the President has as well. I agree, but there still needs to be a larger active-duty force, which has been pretty steady since 9/11 to prevent morale/readiness problems. But at least it looks like things are going okay in Iraq. Ramblings from a Painter (works at the new embassy in Baghdad) has the scoop on the Provincial Elections scheduled for Saturday:

With over 14,400 candidates vying for 440 council seats, there are a lot of people looking for air time for their messages. I was watching an Iraqi channel on TV a little while ago and saw non-stop political ads. I mean non-stop: there wasn't any scheduled programming! Just ads for this candidate or that, with a bunch of "rock-the-vote" style ads in between.

If "too many candidates" is the biggest problem facing Iraqi elections, I'd wager that's pretty good. This is in comparison to 2005 where the Sunnis all boycotted and violence went through the roof. Sure, Iraq still has a lot of problems with poverty, refugees, and corruption, but as far as our military is concerned..."Mission Accomplished". Yeah, I said it, and I'm not even wearing a flight suit with a cod piece. Hopefully our forces can leave Iraq without a lot of problems, because the writing is on the wall that Afghanistan is ramping up.

Governor Blago, We Hardly Knew Ye

Unsurprisingly, the Blagmeister got thrown out of office today, where he will spend the rest of his life shaking down Chicago-area tourists with 3-card Monte. From MSNBC:

Gov. Rod Blagojevich was convicted at his impeachment trial and thrown out of office Thursday, ending a nearly two-month crisis that erupted with his arrest on charges he tried to sell Barack Obama's vacant Senate seat.

Blagojevich becomes the first U.S. governor in more than 20 years to be removed by impeachment.

After a four-day trial, the Illinois Senate voted 59-0 to convict him on the broad charge of abuse of power, then again to disqualify him from ever again holding office in Illinois.

Blago is pretty much the embodiment of every politician: self-absorbed, super sleazy, and always prattling on about how they "help" poor or working families. We will all miss his shenanigans.

ROAD TRIP WITH KATE? YES PLEASE!

Currently Listening To: On Top of the World - Boys Like Girls

Model: Kate Moss

Photographers: Inez van Lamsweerde & Vinoodh Matadin
Styling: Emmanuelle Alt

Vogue Paris April 2008

"Sur La Route"

 

I adore how Emmanuelle Alt styled this shoot. 

Image source: ohnotheydidn't

Snow leopards: rare, majestic, dickish

Oh, no, don't turn around, Snow Leopard. I'll just talk to your giant ass tail. What's the deal with that thing, anyway? Do you lift weights with it? What exactly do you need a tail the size of a large boa constrictor for? Are you cleaning out chimneys?

Nothing, huh? Okay, Snow Leopard. I see what's going on here. You're too busy being an obscure cat. But you know, Snow Leopard, I have feelings, too. Sure, I may not have a tail, and there are more than six billion of me, so I'm not "SUPER FUCKING SPECIAL GUY" like you. But I'm on to you, Snow Leopard, and I think it would be a good idea for you to keep your eyes open, because you never know, Snow Leopard. You. Never. Know.

AND SOME MORE...

   

   

   

These wacky and intricate head pieces come from none other than the Spring 2009 Chanel Couture runways. What do you think?

Image source: model couture

Won't Someone Please Think of the Banker's Girlfriends!

Portrait of Poverty: Distressed Girlfriends of Investment Bankers

You know who's really got it tough after the economy took a big dump? No, not laid off workers in the manufacturing sector from metro Detroit. I'm talking about wealthy Manhattanite chicks who can't get "bottle service" at swanky clubs in SoHo. Their website [Dating a Banker Anonymous] reveals the Dickensian like conditions:

This whole messy ordeal has advanced my Botox start date by at least two years. Like every other DABA girl, the economy was wreaking havoc on my relationship and youthful good looks. Phone calls went unanswered, Hamptons invitations un-extended, plans canceled (including, but not limited to, expensive opening night tickets to the ballet, which were scalped instead of being graciously offered to me and a galpal), and so forth and so on. Until – the horror of all horrors – my FBF lost his job, which I guess technically downgrades him to just my BF.

In general, being an attractive woman is an excuse for just about any sort of egregious behavior. But not this time! At first you might be led to believe that this site is high satire and ask yourself "Are these broads for real?", but a NY Times article reveals that this is indeed not a joke. NYT:

About 30 women, generally in their mid- to late-20s, regularly post to the Web site or attend meetings.

“We do make light of everything on the blog and it’s very tongue in cheek,” said Laney Crowell, 27, who parted ways with a corporate real estate investor last month after a tumultuous relationship. “But it all stems out of really serious and heartfelt situations.”

The Huffington Post sympathizes with the plight of these money-grubbing wenches to the surprise of no one.

This is why America will fail. People are fast becoming accustomed to lavish lifestyles and expecting government intervention and external forces to make it all better. I suggest sending these women to live in the garbage dump in Phnom Penh, Cambodia so they can learn about real hard times. As an aside, I'm going to take a shot in the dark here, and assert that most of these women voted for Obama.

Some GOP Criticism of Stimulus Very Idiotic

Why is Safe Sex Promotion Such a Bad Thing?

Sometimes I am flabbergasted by what conservatives (particularly of the evangelical variety) get so worked up about. The stimulus is chocked full of a lot of porky goodness, but sharpshooting the contraceptive portion of it seems like an exercise in futility (especially when it's a mere drop in the bucket as far as funds are concerned). The GOP leadership is probably making a big stink about this to gratify the part of the base that thinks the Earth is only 5000 years old, but it seems as though there are bigger fish to fry IMHO. Here's House Minority Leader Boehner freaking out. From Politico:

“How you can spend hundreds of millions of dollars on contraceptives?” House Minority Leader John A. Boehner (R-Ohio) asked after meeting with the president at the White House on Friday. “How does that stimulate the economy?”

Waxman had included the funds as part of a $300 million package to slow the spread of sexually transmitted diseases.

The proposal aimed to reduce costs for the states by making it easier for states to pay for contraception for women who qualified under Medicaid and whose income was 200 percent of the federal poverty level.

I understand his point that contraceptive and economic stimulus might have a tenuous connection besides a funny punchline (huh huh stimulus). But I believe there is a need for federal promotion of safe sex. Primarily, because AIDS is an ongoing public health emergency and education plus condom promotion are the best methods to prevent loss of life to this wretched disease. The GOP should recognize that some of the religious right were the nitwits that thought AIDS was divine intervention to kill sodomites (most notoriously Sen. Helms), and opposed any sort of federal response to this epidemic during its initial outbreak in the 1980s.

This ideological, evangelical base opposed to any sort of science that continues to mix their religious beliefs with federal policy needs to quietly go away. Hopefully, if Steele wins RNC chairman, he might make that happen.

Geithner Limits Access for Lobbyists to TARP Funds...Then Hires Ex-Lobbyist as Chief of Staff!

It's Good to Be Connected

Geithner, the recently appointed Treasury Secretary who couldn't figure out TurboTax, has vowed to continue giving the imbeciles on Wall Street that ruined the American economy our taxpayer dollars. However, he has vowed to restrict lobbyist access to what's left of $700B TARP bonanza. From WaPo:

"American taxpayers deserve to know that their money is spent in the most effective way to stabilize the financial system," Geithner said in a statement yesterday. "Today's actions reaffirm our commitment toward that goal."

This sounds like a move in the right direction, since the American public has no clue how the first $350B of TARP funds was spent, and all we here from these greedy banks is that they want more. But Geithner is just putting on a dog-and-pony show, because he just hired a former Goldman Sachs lobbyist to be his Chief of Staff. From USA Today:

Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner picked a former Goldman Sachs lobbyist as a top aide Tuesday, the same day he announced rules aimed at reducing the role of lobbyists in agency decisions.

Mark Patterson will serve as Geithner's chief of staff at Treasury, which oversees the government's $700 billion financial bailout program. Goldman Sachs received $10 billion of that money.

So lobbyists might be barred from stealing your tax dollars under this bailout scam, but it's okay for former ones to be the go-to guy in the Treasury department...W-T-F.

It's long been known that DC is a cesspool of sleaze and corruption, but the Obama administration rode into power vowing to change all that and impose restrictions on former lobbyists working for its staff. But, already there's a Raytheon lobbyist at the DoD, this Goldman Sachs shill, and the "global warming" czar was on the board of directors for a carbon-offsets firm in 2008. Obama must think the American public and media are so stupid that they wouldn't notice these "minor details". Unfortunately, it's already too late to make a difference.

One humorous anecdote from the USA Today article:

Dave Wenhold, of the American League of Lobbyists, said lobbyists bring expertise to the job. "Just because you are registered to lobby doesn't mean that you are evil, " he said.

Maybe not "evil" in the Hitler sense, but having a career based on manipulating public funds to your private employers benefit certainly makes you an asshole.

Unbelievable! WaPo Op-Ed Makes Apologies For Blago, Says He Committed No Crime

Eugene Robinsons Thinks Blago's Sole Crime is His Goofy Hair

Nothing has been as bizarre as the Gov. Blagojevich media campaign to profess his innocence. Appealing to suburban housewives by appearing on The Biew, comparing himself to Gandhi, and talking with Geraldo for a solid 10 minutes during an ambush interview. But let's not lose perspective. He abused the authority of office to benefit himself and shake down others for campaign contributions. Governors have been run out of town for less (see Gov. Spitzer). It is an embarrassment to America that Blagojevich was not suitcase-tossed out of office the day these FBI tapes surfaced. This is not a conservative vs. liberal issue, but rather a rule of law vs. corrupt oligarchy issue.

But, Blago's schmoozing with the media and hiring Drew Peterson's PR people seems to be achieving it's desired effect. A regular WaPo Op-Ed contributor proclaims the man's innocence (yes really). From Eugene Robinson:

But it is unclear to me what else Blagojevich has done that a duly constituted jury would find illegal. Even in the matter of his menacing mop, at worst he's a co-conspirator in a dastardly act committed by his barber.

The liberal Crooks and Liars echoes sentiment that Blago is guilty by suggesting that this is Republican hit job on a guy who has the misfortune of being goofy. Political opinion has become so ideologically polarized that pundits and analysts rush to defend politicians "on their team", no matter how damning the evidence. A sad state of affairs.

Man Goes GG in the Courtroom, Throws Shit at Lawyer and Jury

Truth is always stanger than fiction. From San Diego:

A mistrial was declared Monday when a home-invasion robbery suspect smeared human feces on his attorney's face then threw more at the jury.

Weusi McGowan, 37, was upset because San Diego Superior Court Judge Jeffrey Fraser refused to remove Deputy Alternate Public Defender Jeffrey Martin from the case, prosecutor Christopher Lawson said.

At the mid-morning break, McGowan produced a plastic baggie filled with fecal matter and spread it on Martin's hair and face, then flung the excrement toward the jury box, hitting the briefcase of juror No. 9 but missing the juror himself.

"That juror didn't even see it coming," Lawson said.

Not sure why the prosecutor is surprised that the juror didn't know he was about to get hit with a big pile of shit. Unless you're in a monkey cage, it's pretty safe to say you're probably not gonna get hit in the face with a turd.

What conceited meerkats really want to do is direct

Oh my God, you little highly social jerk off. It's not enough that you get your OWN FUCKING SHOW, you have to be Ansel fucking Adams with the camera. But this is exactly what happens when animals get too popular, it all goes to their heads and they start to think they should be running the show. Guess what, Meerkat? NO ONE WANTS TO SEE YOUR POOR USE OF NEGATIVE SPACE. And yeah, your exploration of morality in a post-9/11 society would be much more impactful if you weren't a fucking cannibal, you sicko.

Let's both you and me face it together, Meerkat. The only reason people pay attention to you is for your looks, and once those go, you will be replaced by a cuter, more talented animal. I'm thinking, oh, I don't know, ELEPHANT ESTATE. Terrified, aren't you, Meerkat? Get ready to find out who your friends really are.

Active Duty Military Barely Increased Following 9/11

Tom Ricks shares a comprehensive powerpoint showing the percentages by rank and by branch that have served in a combat zone. Not surprising when two wars are going on, but it's pretty damn high. The fact that the number of military on active duty has hardly increased is most likely to blame for repeated deployments, national guard mobilizations, stop-loss, and a host of other issues which threaten morale and readiness. You can thank Rumsfeld for that. But will Obama make good on his promise to increase the Army by 65,000 soldiers and the USMC by 27,000 Marines. Stay tuned.

More Regressive Taxation on Working / Middle-Class People, This Time a Booze Tax

Policy Wonks in DC To Cripple Your Way of Life

The cigarette tax wasn't enough for these people, but it's progressive think tankers in DC we're talking about here. Nothing makes these people happier than finding new and improved ways to extort money from rubes in flyover land under the guise of "it's not good for you". Matthew Yglesias, the same bonehead who proposed cars being manufactured to not exceed 75 mph, brings attention to a gentleman who says alcohol taxes just aren't high enough. From Prospect:

Over the past 50 years, Cook reports, the inflation-adjusted value of federal liquor taxes declined by a factor of six while the inflation-adjusted value of federal beer taxes declined by a factor of 3.6. Both taxes are well below what is required to recoup the alcohol-related “externalities” problem drinking imposes on the community.

Typical nanny-state nonsense to socially engineer the rest of America to be like some MoveOn.org party in the Upper West Side. Understandingly, alcohol is primarily enjoyed by the middle and working-class to cope with the crushing bane of existence, despite some of liquor's problems. Furthermore, alcohol is most consumed by red states outside the bible belt (see Time's interactive map). Why don't they impose a tax on crap elite, urban white people prefer like Pilates Balls, Emo Glasses, or Yoga Mats? America is a cosmopolitan place with a vast array of interests and activities for the citizenry. Why do certain groups of people always feel like they have to attack those different from them?

Liberals Spawning At Disturbing Rates

Apparently, They Are Slithering From Pods into College Classrooms

A prof who blogs at The Huffington Post theorizes why colleges have become more liberal: Because boomer parents plopped out so many babies in the 80s. From HuffPo:

When it comes to politics, today's college freshmen resemble their baby boomer parents of 40 years ago in all ways except two. One way makes perfect sense; the other is a puzzle.

The evidence about kids and their parents isn't anecdotal; it's documented in a study just released by UCLA's Higher Education Research Institute, which has been investigating the attitudes of a massive national sample of American freshmen since the 1960s.

More freshmen today say they frequently discuss politics than at any time since Lyndon Johnson announced that he wouldn't run for re-election.

So much for college being a place where you form many political opinions, it seems to be pre-programmed. Pelosi sure was smart to nix the contraception portion of the stimulus package. A government plan to encourage breeding in key congressional districts will ensure a generations worth of citizens who will be completely reliant upon government services and, therefore, will consistently vote Democrat.

Obama Stimulus Turning into a Real Porker

The Democrat stimulus package is fast becoming the "You're Either With Us or Against Us" for the new Obama administration. Lefty blogs are already on witch-hunts for conservative pundits who dare ask questions about how close to trillion dollars will be spent. Liberal economist Paul Krugman lashes out at the new traitors of our nation. From New York Times:

But here’s the thing: Most Americans aren’t listening. The most encouraging thing I’ve heard lately is Mr. Obama’s reported response to Republican objections to a spending-oriented economic plan: “I won.” Indeed he did — and he should disregard the huffing and puffing of those who lost.

A trillion dollars isn't exactly an impulse buy of a spatula at the Albertson's. This is a lot of dough! And with a lot of money that will be unaccounted for, there's always Congress parasite or two to come looking for a handout. Senator Durbin is already looking for a billion dollar project for some "clean coal" power plant in his district, and Saxby Chambliss is already talking about the USAF needs more F-22s to keep jobs in his district. There's no reason to believe that Obama will be the savior of America or that the government will fix our catastrophic economic problem that was caused by people living beyond their means. It's just politics as usual.

Hazmat Team Responds to 200-Gallon Hot Sauce Spill

What a shame! Is there any finer cuisine than Buffalo Wings? From Fairfield, Connecticut:

Nobody was able to cross the road Monday afternoon in front of Archie Moore's restaurant after 200 gallons of chicken wing sauce spilled onto Sanford Street.

The street was closed several hours after the 1:30 p.m. spill as the state Haz-mat team was dispatched to the scene.

Chicken wings are a signature item on the restaurant's menu and four large barrels of sauce for the spicy concoction were being delivered by Estes Express Line. As the truck driver was pushing a barrel toward the open truck door, it tipped over and spilled into the street, right in front of the restaurant.

"There's sauce everywhere," Perez said. "It's halfway across the street."

Oh the humanity!

SECDEF Gates Says Military-Industrial Complex is Fucked

The Secretary of Defense is testifying to the House Armed Services Committee where he noted that things have not been going well in Afghanistan (thank you Mr. Obvious). Wired has pulled an interesting quote from his testimony regarding the DoD bureaucracy and how it has handled modern warfare:

Efforts to put the bureaucracy on a war footing have, in my view, revealed underlying flaws in the institutional priorities, cultural preferences, and reward structures of America’s defense establishment – a set of institutions largely arranged to plan for future wars, to prepare for a short war, but not to wage a protracted war. The challenge we face is how well we can institutionalize the irregular capabilities gained and means to support troops in theater that have been, for the most part, developed ad hoc and funded outside the base budget.

Can anyone not say that acquisitions/procurement have been an absolute disgrace during the last 8 years? Last week, Lt. Col. Yingling took note of the type of officer culture of trying to get costly, but ineffective, weapons systems into production to support big defense contractors from bellwether states. The legacy of the last 8 years is hillbilly armor on humvees, an FBI raid on Murtha's buddies that he gave money to, and billions of dollars down the drain. Maybe the whole Cold War-era concept that the Defense Department should only exist to "create jobs" should be scrapped in light of COIN conflicts that have been going for over 7 years, but the GS-13s working for Uncle Sucker in DC have failed to notice.

Blackfive has more on the conventional vs. irregular warfare debate, and they suggest that we should be prepared for both. I agree! But that's not what Gates is griping about. He's talking about the faceless bureaucracy that is completely opposed to do anything differently based on strategic threats and continues to advocate this obsolete view of the world. We're paying for this government, might as well try to get them to do a good job.

Get your own damn legs, Pig

I see you're very proud of yourself aren't you, Pig? You get to walk around the fair without exerting any effort. For what? So you can roll around in the mud the rest of the day and not get tired? What are you doing that's so fucking exhausting that you get to be carried around and have your picture taken like you're the fucking king of the fair? EVERYBODY BOW DOWN TO THE LITTLE PIG, KING OF THE COTTON CANDY STAND. I think it's time you learned to fend for yourself, you little piece of-

What? I can hold him?... Okay, just for one second... NO! Stay strong, don't let him get to you.

Barack HUSSEIN Obama Talkz With Muslin Media!

Just kidding about the post title, but Obama did an interview with the popular, international media outlet Al-Arabiya for an interview recently. Al-Arabiya is owned by some rich sheikhs from Saudi Arabia and a few other Gulf states, and has been strongly opposed to terrorism in the past. I respect what Obama is trying to do: utilizing public diplomacy to squash some rumors regarding America that continue to persist in the Middle East. For example, many citizens in moderate countries, like Jordan, believe that 9/11 was not caused by terrorists. Obama walked the tightrope on the Israeli/Palestinian issue, which the interviewer hit him up with first. From the transcript:

Ultimately, we cannot tell either the Israelis or the Palestinians what's best for them. They're going to have to make some decisions. But I do believe that the moment is ripe for both sides to realize that the path that they are on is one that is not going to result in prosperity and security for their people. And that instead, it's time to return to the negotiating table.

Probably a smart move, as there's no greater polarizing issue in the Middle East than Israel, and we'd be best to keep our distance to some extent. I don't understand our nation's preoccupation with sustaining Israel through aid and completely unwavering support. Is it in our constitution somewhere? If they're such great allies, how come they don't contribute any military forces to Iraq or Afghanistan? I have nothing against Israel, but I don't see why America needs to bend over backwards to support them even at our own diplomatic peril.

Although, his comments about Iran were a bit strange and come near the end:

But I do think that it is important for us to be willing to talk to Iran, to express very clearly where our differences are, but where there are potential avenues for progress. And we will over the next several months be laying out our general framework and approach. And as I said during my inauguration speech, if countries like Iran are willing to unclench their fist, they will find an extended hand from us.

Since Al-Arabiya is from the Gulf, I doubt they have much sympathy for Iran. Also, it doesn't look like Iran is going to want to talk to us in the first place. We'll see how that works out. Maybe Ahmadinejad will unleash some creepy hour-long rant about how there are no Persian homosexuals like he did at Columbia.

Predictable: Al Gore's Global Warming Speech May Be Delayed Due to Winter Storm

From the Apocalypse font at Drudge:

Al Gore is scheduled before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee on Wednesday morning to once again testify on the 'urgent need' to combat global warming.

But Mother Nature seems ready to freeze the proceedings.

A 'Winter Storm Watch' has been posted for the nation's capitol and there is a potential for significant snow... sleet... or ice accumulations.

"I can't imagine the Democrats would want to showcase Mr. Gore and his new findings on global warming as a winter storm rages outside," a Republican lawmaker emailed the DRUDGE REPORT. "And if the ice really piles up, it will not be safe to travel."

A spokesman for Sen. John Kerry, who chairs the committee, was not immediately available to comment on contingency plans.

There's a certain scientific laziness in attributing every winter storm to proof that global warming is a hoax, but the "Gore Effect" seems to be recurring...and equally hilarious.

$825B Stimulus Plan to Take Forever to Implement

Stimulus Spending by the Federal Government Might be a Tad Slow

Obama is doing his best to drum up bipartisan support for this monstrous stimulus package, and some of the sharpest conservative criticism has been regarding the family planning portion of the spending. I'm very supportive of contraception, as America is fast becoming a country where only stupid people breed and the rest of us have to pick up the tab through tax credits and Medicaid. Mike Judge wasn't just a director, he was a prophet. But the best criticism of the government boondoggle from Hades is from the CBO director, who just released a detailed analysis of the package. From the official Congressional Budget Office blog:

Frequently in the past, in all types of federal programs, a noticeable lag has occurred between sharp increases in funding and resulting increases in outlays. Based on such experiences, CBO expects that federal agencies, states, and other recipients of funding would find it difficult to properly manage and oversee a rapid expansion of existing programs so as to spend added funds quickly as they expend their normal resources. The seasonal nature of some spending also affects the speed at which activities can be conducted; for example, major school repairs are generally scheduled during the summer to avoid disrupting classes.

So, money authorized by the feds to spend on "shovel-ready" projects will get tied up in paperwork at various echelons of government offices. This unseen cost of administration probably explains why the VA has a budget of $90 Billion a year, but vets have to wait 8 months to see a dentist. The Washington Post takes note of this even though they are a bit more optimistic than me. No matter how awesome you may think The Obama is as president, he is no match for the Kafka-esque foe of federal bureaucracy.

Blago Takes Circus Act on the Road

Rod Blagojevich Waxes Poetically with a Potted Plant

Not since Blackwater stood accused of massacring over a dozen Iraqi civilians has the media been so receptive to such a shamelees PR campaign. Hot Rod has hired the firm that worked for wife-killer Drew Peterson, so you know the company has to be prestigious. So far, his best work has been comparing himself to Gandhi. From Washington Times:

In an interview on NBC's "Today" show, Blagojevich said his impeachment trial is "rigged" and the federal charges that he tried to sell his appointment for the U.S. Senate vacated by Barack Obama are false, according to a transcript of the interview.

"I thought about Mandela, Dr. King, Gandhi and trying to put some perspective in all of this," he said of his Dec. 9 arrest.

Last week, Blago compared the attacks on his family to Pearl Harbor, but now he is comparing himself to actual people instead of events, which may have initially confused some Americans out in zombie land. Sounds like that high-priced PR firm is really paying off.

For the Kid Who Already Has Everything: A Dead Girl Doll

Now this is totally classy! If you haven't turned on a cable TV station in the last 6 months, you may have missed out on the latest edition in the "missing and/or dead white girl" saga. The most recent media obsession is Caylee Anthony, who's corpse got fished out of the swamp last month. In trial by media fashion, the mother is widely suspected of being the culprit. This would make the photos of her shaking her ass at a club after the daughter was murdered even more bizarre. To further exploit death and misery beyond just what the Greta Van Susterens of the world are doing, a toy company in Jackson is making a dolly of the dead child that sings. From Orlando Sentinel:

A Jacksonville promotions company plans to sell a doll as a tribute to slain toddler Caylee Marie Anthony.

The Inspirational Caylee Sunshine Doll will go on sale Tuesday for $29.99.

The blonde-haired, 18-inch doll wears jeans and a T-shirt depicting a sun and the phrase: "CAYLEE SUNSHINE." The song "You Are My Sunshine" plays when her belly button is pushed.

The don't mention what song the doll sings if you tape it's mouth and chuck it in the trunk of your car, hi-yo!

OH CHANEL

Currently Listening To: Imagine - John Lennon

   

Image source: tfs / style

This bunny wants to ambush your sensibilities

**A teaching moment on Fuck You, Penguin.**

Bunny, what the hell do you think you are doing? Those people out there are just trying have a nice walk in the woods, and here you are waiting for the perfect moment to pounce on them and tear their insides out, hop by excruciating hop. STOP TRYING TO CAUSE A SPONTANEOUSLY CUTE INCIDENT. Did you think I wouldn't see you? Did you think you could just go around, hiding in the dark corners of the world, working to undermine everything that holds civilized society together? You disgust me, Bunny.

LESSON: Never walk through a garden or a jungle without being aware of the distinct possibility that there could be some ridiculously cute asshole bunny crouched in the shadows, ready to pounce and violate your sacred sense of decency.

Late Nite Tunes: The Rev - Psychobilly Freakout

Great song from a young Reverend Horton Heat. Been trying to do this song on Guitar Hero 2 to help quit smoking, but it keeps kicking my ass. Maybe I should get help from this 8-year old.

George Will Laments the Death of Fiscal Conservatism

Time is Running Out

Respected conservative commentator George Will sounds the alarm on runaway federal spending that is certain to bankrupt the country. From Real Clear Politics:

If he does tackle the problem of the teetering entitlement system, he will do so at an unpropitious moment: Events are making reform more necessary while making it seem less urgent. A nation in which $350 billion was but the first half of the Troubled Asset Relief Program, and in which TARP is distinct from the perhaps $850 billion "stimulus" program, is a nation being taught not to take seriously sums with merely nine digits and two commas.

It's easy to fall into the line of thinking that because the federal government spent billions and billions on Wall Street banks, then they might as well spend money on everything from the auto companies to free college education. Hell, all democracy in America is about is voting blocs trying to get themselves chunks of government largess. Not many people are really taking the time to ask how all this shit is going to be paid for. I'm glad at least one respected guy is.

Lobbyists To Make a Killing Off Obama Stimulus

Washington Times takes note of the real winners of the proposed $825B stimulus package:

A Washington Times review of lobbying disclosure reports found that 18 of the top 20 recipients of federal bailout money spent a combined $12.2 million lobbying the White House, the Treasury Department, Congress and federal agencies during the last quarter of 2008.

For instance, the government bought $3.4 billion in American Express Co. stock on Jan. 9 as part of an aid package. In the last quarter of 2008, the company spent more than $1 million on federal lobbying.

To hell with investing in mutual funds, looks like the real money is investing in lobbying! Obama's economic adviser criticized the the stimulus package saying it was only going to help "white male construction workers", to which the lefty blog Crooks and Liars responded that many Americans were only capable of menial office work as opposed to physical labor. But, it seems like the lobbyist biz in D.C. is quite lucrative already. No wonder there is no recession in Washington.

YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL

Models Taryn Davidson and Ali Stephens, I must say they look incredible!

Image source: Teen Vogue

THE LOOK IN YOUR EYES

Image source: ohnotheydidnt

SUMMER BEAUTY

Currently Listening To: Always Where I Need To Be - The Kooks

Model: Elsa Hosk

Photographer: Jimmy Backius

Cafe November 2008

Image source: ru_glamour