AN OPEN LETTER TO JETER FROM YOUR FEMALE SUPERFANS

Dear Derek,

Let me begin by offering my sincerest of apologies that you and Minka are no longer a couple. It must be very difficult for you to move on after such a long and happy relationship. As the self-appointed Queen of the Superfans, and Resident Relationship Expert, please allow me to offer you some advice on this subject.

1. ANALYSIS: Look very closely at her first name... Minka. Really? Okay, yes, it sounds exotic and unusual. But anyone with the word "Mink" as part of their first name is a "red-flag"...minks cost money, and they're not even in style anymore. The high maintenance, 5th Avenue girls that you've been hanging out with are obviously not a right match. For example, a woman such as myself, who's financially independent, smart dresser but still a bargain shopper, is probably a better fit, just sayin'.

2. BASEBALL: Minka admits that she knew nothing about baseball when she met you. Wait, what? You are a baseball legend, an icon. They may even one day re-name Cooperstown to Jetertown! How did this happen? What could you possibly have to talk about with a girl like that? The last thing you need is someone you have to "coach around the bases". This was an inning-ending line drive from the get-go, my friend.

3. AGE: I know it's very difficult for baseball players to discuss this issue. Trust me, I understand completely. It's not easy for me either. But look, you get to retire about 40 years before I do. Do you really think that being with someone in their mid twenties is a suitable match for poolside conversation? Look, anyone who doesn't have a handle on who "The Sugarhill Gang" was and thinks "Back to the Future" was a video game is not for you. I'm no cougar, Derek. Someone your age, or even a little older, has intelligence, experience and a lot to offer you; a girl with brains and worldly wisdom is more your style.

4. LOOKS: this is perhaps the most important of all. You are known as the "pretty boy" of baseball. Why on earth would you stick with the picture perfect model-types? You need to stand out as the jewel in the crown. You don't need to have someone stealing your thunder in that area.Yes, they're pretty and make nice arm candy. But do they have "substance"? Can they discuss world issues with you? Politics? Fantasy Baseball stats? My guess is no. No, the perfect match for you is not someone who spends more money on makeup than they do on a car payment. The girl for you is the one who spends money and time on pinstriped gear and can open your beer for you with her bare hands.

Let's think long term here, Derek. All of this stuff is really nice, but when all is said and done, you need someone who can hang in with you for the long haul. Sure, Minka was pretty and rumor has it that she was really sweet. But us Superfans saw this coming a long time ago. Please consider this as an unselfish gesture of good will and, of course, having only your best interests in mind.

Hit me on the Twitter @ChristyLee127 ... I'm available!

Love, Christy

--Christy Lee, BYB Staff Writer







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